Dear Joey:
When I say I love you, please believe its true.
When I say forever, know Ill never leave you.
When I say goodbye, promise me you wont cry.
Cause the day Ill be saying that would be the day I die.
I have no idea when to actually post this…. and as there was a little scary time yesterday I didn’t tell you about… so …. basically I would rather say this particular quote to you too early then too late and never have said it at all.
Well… actually there is a LOT I don’t tell you because it is not private here…. and also because … well it makes me feel anyway like I am some F’n invalid.. and I don’t feel that way… so maybe I fear it makes me LOOK like a F’n invalid… which again I am not…. but I am semi retired now…. but in some ways I have been sine taking are of T alone… so that is nothing new…. yes I am sick.. but that does not mean I am incapable of doing most things… I am perfectly capable of doing more than most still… but yes there are a few times when I don’t feel so well and my energy is down.. but I STILL get those things done… I still think I have/can, do and still accomplish more in a tear then most people do in 10.. for real… only not many an see what I do… but just being a single parent is hard enough and too hard for some… let alone a single FATHER/ parent of an autistic DAUGHTER/ child with no support structure or family here to help even a little.
Anyway.. sorry I vented… sometimes I want to say things and then after I do I am not sure if I should have… and then I don’t know how you will take them… and maybe I just think I get no credit for what I do… not that I deserve credit for doing what is right… it is just sometimes an emotional boost to get me over/through the low days… and then I think of JESSI G and what she must be going through.. or how difficult it must be for Yeni… and others I wont mention… and think I am just being silly. foolish selfish and a child ….
so again I appologize for my rantings if they have offended you in any way.
Love you Joey.. sorry but I do and cant stop even though I have tried.
100% Always andf Forever
craig
